Message 3

                                    Long time, …

Hello,

I am back in the land of the living. Back breathing, walking and smiling.

How are you doing?

Usually when I skip a week of posting, it’s my choice. Either because I want to rest when I have had a tough week or when I want to rest because of any other reason. And you might say. Oh, you rest a lot. Hmmm, well. Not enough. I pride myself into being a hard worker. Not ashamed to say it because it’s who I am. And in the last two weeks, that part was seriously tested when I couldn’t do anything apart from breathing while lying on the bed or couch with limbs and body members that couldn’t help me to accomplish anything. In order words, I was sick.

It started a couple of hours after coming back from this amazing restaurant where I had what I didn’t order. My sister did. I had a spoonful of her food, and to my surprise it had an odd taste. Something cheesy mixed with peanuts. “Interesting”, I said to her. She looked at me and asked if I wanted to trade my salad with her food. She said she didn’t like it. Well, since I found it delicious, I offered to finish hers. ¾ of the food is what I ate without knowing that it was not pleasing where it was going. Oh man if I knew what was going to happen later.

5 hours later, I started having gas. The non-toxic ones. You know the bearable ones. The ones nobody notices other than you. But eventually, even if no one noticed them, my body started feeling weird. A cold, here and there. A sudden loss of appetite. And a tongue tasting everything sour. Little by little, all the strength I had in my body left slow by slow to the point where lifting a small spoon was tough work. For an additional 10 hours, I felt like I am slowly shutting down. And the real battle began 20 hours later when my growling stomach had enough to discharge. I mean:

• Have you ever felt sudden cold in your feet and fingers while feeling like there is a machine twisting your insides?
• Have you ever screamed of pain to the point where your own noise gives you headache?
• Have you ever held a wall and asked it to hold you back because no amount of affection from a person can console you?
• Have you ever seated and saw yourself sinking in a hole you don’t know how you’ll get back out of?
• Etc…

Of course, I am writing this blog a week later. Recovering, still taking some antibiotics. Still feeling some tingling here and there. But the doctor reassured me that that’s how healing feel. And I know he is right because I can see and feel the change. But, let me tell you something. I don’t wish ill to anybody. What I had was painful and agonizing. For 6 days, I cried and prayed each time I took a bowl movement. Of course, I was taking medicine (not antibiotics). And it wasn’t working. It was only after 4 days, that the test came back, and they found what I had. A bacterial infection. And swallowing a couple of antibiotics per day slowly recovered me from sinking. Most importantly I believe that God saved me and allowed me to continue live. I believe that if he wasn’t with me while I was holding to the wall wanting to crush it, I could have crushed the ones I live with, with my words. And I know that he planned the forced rest on me for a reason I am still not aware of and I trust his will.

Long story short, I am grateful that I didn’t rest for real. I am grateful to be alive and back with strength and might to do what I love the most. I am most grateful for you to have read this blog. I pray that you find courage in your most difficult time and that you believe that everything is not over yet. Hang in there. In case you don’t believe in God’s miracles. Try Him and you shall see his wonders.