MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR 2024

It’s no brainer now, everybody is going to wake up Jan 1 with a list of resolutions. I’ve seen people quitting their jobs in January too. Wait! They go back mid-year when they see that they can’t be the ‘entrepreneur’ they thought they could be. They find out that their affirmations obviously didn’t help much. In order words, they figure that doing the hard work by yourself require hard work which was not on the list. “The list said: Open a business, no work hard for it.”  But whoever who was in that situation, good job for going back. It’s never bad to come back to your senses sometimes. 

So, the holiday season is here. Everywhere you step you see Christmas lights, decorations, gifts, clothes, etc. There is a lot, if you are a person who doesn’t enjoy this season, you might get sick. 

To be honest, it’s good to see people smiling when they talk about the plans they have for the holidays. But it’s also sad to watch people dreading, waiting for December to be over. I used to be like that a few years ago. I was in a country, still is. A country where I had nobody to celebrate with. Hold on. I had people. But they had each other. And I was a guest for the day. So going back home at 3am on the 24^th and on the 1^st was not a pleasant feeling. Sometimes, I didn’t want to go. It reminded me so much of the people I am close to that are not present when I want them to. When I want to hug them and wish them ‘Happy New Year’. It was sickening. I remember spending 2 years in a row alone in my apartment. Sometimes I’d cry. Other times, I would cry too. 

Having access to celebrate with the ones you love is regarded as a privilege for the ones who don’t have anyone to be with. You see cars pulling up at your neighbors, hearing their laughter all night, music blasting and people waking up in their pjs at noon. And you think: I wish I was with my loved ones too. 

On the other hand, for those celebrating together. You never know if the party was all fun and games. Sometimes, it’s a gathering of sorrow souls that have brushed so much of their pain under the rug to the point where if it was not a tradition. None of them would be sitting in the same place. Now, that’s very sad. In my opinion, there is no need to gather when you know seeing dad or mom or aunty whoever or uncle whoever will give you the need to want to strangle somebody. There is no need to attend. And no matter the tradition made by society, you as an individual are not under obligation to show up at a place you feel hurt, offended, or abused. You can enjoy your life by yourself and be glad you have made it through a whole year safe and sane. 

Equally important, it’s best to evaluate your previous year and first congratulate yourself on the good things you’ve done good. It’s also crucial to analyze where you slacked off. Being aware that you didn’t do everything perfectly will help you improve to be a better person.

In the new year, it’s good to give yourself small goals for each week or month. It’s okay if you don’t meet those goals once or twice. But 3 times? You should watch out and change your habits. 

In the new year, it’s good to promise yourself to be good to both you and others. What I’ve seen so far is that nobody can take care of you the most other than yourself. Did you read that right? Nobody. For instance, if you are hungry, cook or buy yourself a meal. Don’t starve and don’t overeat either. 

• Learn ways to control your emotions – you don’t have to slam doors or people. Be a better you and seek help. Learn how to watch your mouth especially when you are angry. Try to be quiet if you don’t have something good to say. 
• Look for ways to improve your health – go workout and eat healthy. It’s difficult at first but you can avoid some diseases just by not eating those fast food every week. 
• Search for a therapist if you know that you are struggling with any addiction (new or old) – trust me whoever that hurt you or whatever that lead you in that path is not benefiting from your struggles. You are the one in pain. So, be gentle on yourself and seek help. The earlier the better.
• If you think you are a perfect person. Throw that ego and pride in the garbage your city is picking the last day of 2023. Nobody is perfect. Thinking about you being perfect makes you imperfect. Get over it.
• Be a better parent. Heal from your generational wounds. You don’t have to speak to your children the same way your parents did. They deserve a better parent. Work on being one. Apologize if necessary. Warning: Don’t make it a habit. If you always apologize after hurting someone, you are now abusing them. Be there for your children. It’s not only money they need. They crave your presence too. So work on that.
• Be a better child to your parents. Recognize what they have done for you. Oh wait! Did you just think it was their responsibility to do so. Yes. It was. But if you were raised like your neighbor’s child, you’ll be in a different situation, and you know it. So, if your parents didn’t leave you and raised you to be a good man or woman, thank them. They probably sacrificed a lot. Ah stop! Please don’t be like those spoiled kids who think ‘oh I didn’t ask to be born. It’s what parents are supposed to do’. Stop being childish and selfish.
• Be a good person, a good coworker (one that leave peace), a good manager (one that lead people and talk to them with respect – no need to throw your frustration on your employees), a good partner (one that’s there when needed), a good friend (one that’s loyal and trustworthy), etc.

In short, resolutions should be made every time change is needed. Not only at the beginning of a new year. But since most like to make them in January of each year, make sure you stay true to yourself in anything you set yourself up for. Prioritize your wellbeing and take life as a gift. Be happy and take care. 

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.