FALLEN AWAY – P1

I don’t know where to begin,

Because the level of my pain is unbearable,

And I am sorry!

If I wonder, would that help ease my pain?

You see I am alive. Breathing but I wish it wasn’t me.

Of course, I wouldn’t know how they would feel.

I mean I am not here,

But I would imagine their pain won’t be as agonizing as mine.

Sad to think and speak!

I woke up and withing a few hours,

I loss pieces of my heart.

Little after my soul has left my body.

I can’t think – I can’t eat – I can’t talk – I can’t stop screaming – I can’t stop staring at the sky.

I don’t know why!

My hands are open to the heavens,

but I can’t remember what I have been praying for anymore.

How? How?

I can’t remember but I used to know.

People are different. Each their own way.

I have Lea next to me. I should know.

She is hurt as much as me. We have both loss a lot in a little time.

I used to embrace her and forgive her for taking what’s not hers

But how can I forgive those who have taken what was created for me without warning?

How can another human kill me as if we are not both human beings?

Do I wish my pain on anyone?

God knows I don’t.

But why did He allow it to happen to me?

They are gone God!

And since my heart cannot face – nor understand – nor bear the pain.

Please allow my eyes to bleed the mountain of sorrow my soul detains.